Frequently asked questions

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A lot of people will quite rightly say, I don’t see how talking can help me. Bad things do happen to good people and we cannot change the past. Therapy is all about change and we can change the present and therefore the future.

Talking therapy can help with changing thoughts or perspectives, finding meaning. It can also help with changing behaviours. 

Honestly - yes and no. I don’t judge people on their thoughts or actions. That’s above my pay grade.

I do have to judge whether or not I’m the right person to help someone, is the person in front of me in the right place - literally and figuratively. Now is not always the right time for therapy.

No. Please see above - there’s always an explanation for how we are and oftentimes it’s because of things that weren’t our fault. It’s my job to empathise and empower someone to move forward. 

I have an amazing supervisor! I also have self-care strategies - I literally touch grass, and have a little herb garden. I’ve gone through the therapy process a few times myself to make sure my stuff doesn’t get mixed up with your stuff and I cause damage.

Part of my role is to help people contain their emotions and same for myself. Compassion fatigue is a thing, hence the essential role of supervision - it helps keep tabs on any signs of burnout.

Also my job isn’t just about hearing about suffering- I’m privileged to bear witness to the amazing resilience, strength and determination of the people I work with. It is an inspiring and humbling experience. Forgive me for being terrible with names, but I remember every single story. It’s because I connect emotionally with I hear and it stores it in a different part of my memory. 

We go through a process of assessment together. Based on what you tell me, in conjunction with your goals for therapy, I can then give an indication of which approach I think may be a fit for you. In coming to that recommendation, I’ll be informed by clinical guidelines, professional and ethical guidelines as well as practice-based evidence.

Ultimately I might not have the right practice tools for your needs and I’ll help with transition to the right place or person. 

Sometimes we can agree quite quickly if I’m not the right person. A typical assessment however is usually over two fifty minute sessions.

Session one I’ll be hoping to understand a potted life history from you. A condensed timeline helps me with developing a formulation.

Psychologists use formulation to give understanding to how and why things have happened and also what is keeping the difficulty going. Is it external or internal factors like unhelpful thinking patterns?

Formulation also helps me think about which type of therapeutic approach might fit someone. If you say to me, I’m quite a rational person, then that might point me in the direction of a structured therapy. This is what’ll happen in session two - I’ll share my thinking and introduce the model and how I think it can apply.

Formulation also helps me think about how we do the therapy. If you’re saying external factors like life demands are excessive, then we have to think realistically about how you can manage reflective practice in between sessions. 

I can only ever go on what you tell me, at any point. Even if I ask you to fill out a questionnaire to measure mood, the results depend upon your answers.

What I will do is set clear goals with you in the beginning so we have some measure of progress. I check with people each week - how is this going, how are you finding the work?

Don’t be worried about hurting my feelings or any judgement. The therapeutic process works better if we can be honest. In return, I’ll tell someone if I think it’s not helping and think together how that could change.

Ultimately, that might mean pausing or moving on. It’s your time and resources so it has to be right for you. 

Sorry but I would love to give you a straight answer but it genuinely depends on the formulation, clinical guidelines and goals. I am upfront however and would tell someone initially what my assessment of time needed would be. 

This is more of a general question that comes up in therapy. Sometimes people ask what would I do in their shoes or what do I think about a course of action.

I will do the slippery psychologist thing and bat it right back with ‘what do you think?’. Anyone and everyone can give you advice, good and bad advice! If I did that, then that just makes me the same as anyone else with an opinion (and you know what they say about opinions?! Everyone has one.).

My role is to work with your empowerment and confidence in your ability to make the right decisions for your life. You are ultimately the one who has to live with the consequences and you want to feel confident that you can deal with whatever comes. 

No, and I know some colleagues do. It can be really helpful in determining if you feel that person is someone you could work with. Please allow me to use a fictional situation to illustrate for why I prefer to meet for initial sessions.

Imagine I had a phone call from a Dr Harleen Quinzel who said she wanted to talk about developing feelings for someone at her workplace. Harleen then discloses to me that she is Harley Quinn and her boyfriend The Joker are planning to destroy Arkham and Batman.

I have no information on where Harley is, nor any agreement for the disclosure of information. It poses a really tricky ethical dilemma.

In a first session with someone, I’m clear about confidentiality and the limits of confidentiality. I’ll also gather information about the person that could help me act if any actions to protect the person or others who may be at risk. It may be necessary to act if the intent to commit crime is disclosed for instance.

I would be glad to have a quick phone call to discuss initial details, agree a time to meet and answer general questions.